Work. It. Out.

I feel guilty for not going to the gym. I didn't always feel this way, guilty, but now I do.

It took me awhile to get where I am today. Back track a few years and I hardly stepped into a gym. I got a pass when I was a senior in high school and my mom splurged and hired me a personal trainer. It was nice, because someone kicked my ass and even though it was hard I did it because I was told to do it. And then the personal training stopped because it became too expensive and I fell off the wagon.

Mom pushed me, "I'm going to the gym today, come with me", and I usually would, but I'd hardly go by myself. And then I just kind of gave up and quit because it was too hard. Mom canceled my gym pass and I became lazy.

Fast forward a year and I remember sitting on the couch in the middle of the day feeling extremely lethargic. I had a good night sleep, I ate that morning, had coffee even but still felt tired. I remember thinking, "I probably should not feel like this as a 20 year old, I should have more energy". I told my mom about how I was feeling and she told me I should try to work out again, because she noticed she had so much energy from working out. So I tried to hop back on the wagon.

It was hard at first, getting back into the routine. It took me awhile to even just go. Fortunately I had a buddy, my mom, to work out with when I wasn't feeling motivated. But then after awhile I started doing it on my own and pushing myself to go a little longer. It was tough but I just did it. I started out with once a week, then twice and so on. It wasn't until about a year later that I finally hit a solid five times a week of working out. It felt good.

My energy was back and I felt like my age. I actually enjoyed working out, believe it or not. I'm much healthier now than I have ever been and it feels really good. I've lost weight and feel proud of myself. I've also developed the habit of eating better.

So I feel guilty because I have only gone twice so far this week. Today technically should be my fourth day. But if I look back at everything I have accomplished I realize I shouldn't feel guilty, but proud and it's okay to take a day off every now and then. And plus, I've got homework to do!